Lesson 80

What Are Some Ways To Heal The Pain And Brokenness?

“Our healing journey brought new context to the idea of the Lord being full of grace and truth,” Beth reflected. “I found hope in the fact that the Lord became flesh – part of the very nature that causes us to sin – and dwelt among us. Not from a place on high but rather right in the middle of our pain and brokenness. We had to keep returning to this truth as healing of our sexual intimacy did not happen instantly, even when we had the best intentions! There was my husband’s history, as well as issues in the spiritual realm. He did not need my judgment but he did need my support. Jesus Himself never condemns us in our situations, but rather seeks to restore us in compassion, meekness, and love. I needed grace not only for my husband but for myself. Eventually through prayer and practice, we were able to present our bodies to each other in mutual submission and love.”

Beth continued to remember their journey: “I often wish the Bible read like a self-help book where we could just turn to the chapter we needed and get immediate answers to our problems! Restoring sexual intimacy was one of those areas where I needed help. While the Bible didn’t provide instant help, it did help to get back into the Word of God. My other suggestion to wives would be biblical counseling or biblical books on the subject to help reestablish a biblically based definition and understanding of God-honoring sexual intimacy. Add communication and prayer. Then finally, I suggest that couples become aware of negative thoughts, behaviors, or even environments to see if they trigger certain behaviors, and then be proactive about combating them and establishing new behaviors.”