Lesson 59

How Much Sin Should I Tolerate In My Marriage?

Rebecca knew about her husband’s pornography use because she occasionally stumbled upon it. She could sense that the more he engaged in pornography, the more it was affecting their relationship. “I had fairly low expectations of marriage. I thought ours was okay. Not perfect, but I was convinced none were. Part of what I needed to do was to set my sights higher and become less accommodating of sin.”

Many wives accept the notion that men like to look at female bodies and they simply chalk it up to maleness. Yet the Bible says it this way, “Anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” (Matthew 5:28) “I think in some ways I may have had a weak conscience initially in that I was not convinced that pornography use was sinful, but over time it became much clearer to me it was a sin and that it was damaging our marriage. We had to re-prioritize our spiritual lives.”

They researched and read several Bible studies and Christian books on godly marriages. Rebecca intentionally concentrated on the biblical role of the wife to avoid becoming discontented with the parts of the husband’s role that she felt her husband was doing wrong. “I recognized that even if my husband didn’t change, I needed to fulfill my part as a wife before the Lord and trust Him to sustain me when I felt rejected and unloved.” She began praying earnestly every morning before she did anything else and soon they both agreed to begin a time of reading the Bible together every night.