Lesson 88

How Does Building Up Our Marriage Help In The Hard Times?

“The most important lesson I learned during our recovery is that all relationships are transactional,” Beth explained. “Building up means constantly making deposits so that there is a robust savings account to cover times when we need to withdraw. Building up might mean encouragement, intimacy, acts of service, quality time, or something else that is valuable to our spouse. A withdrawal could be a sickness, a really stressful time, or even sin against each other. Although I seek to always do good, I know this life is full of disappointments and failure, so it’s important that my husband and I build each other up to survive the valleys and also celebrate the mountaintops. We have our hope and faith in Christ who paid the ultimate price – the transaction that righted the books with God. Truly Christ is the prime example of making the greatest ‘deposit’ for us.”

Beth knew her husband was ready and willing to be restored when he articulated his actions as sin. “It was certainly a different perspective when he turned from his secretive life into full-on conviction. From there he took actionable steps to remove temptations from his lifestyle. He admitted to me that he deleted files, installed software, and got connected with an accountability partner. He realized that the solution to this battle was not going to come from within himself, that this was part of a spiritual issue and that no level of desire to stop would be effective without a plan that included the mercy and grace of the Lord.”